LAURA WROTE: I turned 32 this week, and am no longer officially young (thanks to Asher Roth’s MILF age qualifier of being at least 32 - I don’t even have KIDS, and I’m officially a frigging MILF?). When did I cross the line from Miss to Ma’am?
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The tween site for adults
Formerly French
SHARON WROTE: It took me three years to relent and agree to leave behind olive trees and year-round sunshine, baguettes, eight-week vacations and free childcare...Still, even now – ten years and a second son later – I often find it hard to believe how many wonderful things we had to give up in order for everything to truly be BETTER.
Finally FREE TO BE
LUCKYGIRL WROTE: I spent 39 taking a long look at where I am and where I want to be (and what I want for my girls) and found that I can be fabulous on my own!
Formerly Not Hot
LEANNE WROTE: Am feeling self-generated pressure to maintain the physically fit, post-Menopause body I created within the last couple years. When does conscientious working out slink into obsession?
Less is less
KELLY WROTE: Am I the only one out here that has to spend three times longer applying twice as much stuff to look half as I good way back when?
Kiss my mature ass
JESSICA WROTE: In our meeting he told me I looked older, he attempted to redeem himself by saying, "I mean more mature." Ouch.
Dame in distress
CYNTHIA WROTE: I used to be able to count on manly types stopping to assist when auto failure haunted my travels....A recent breakdown found not a soul willing to offer a jump-start, and I knew I'd "crossed over."
The old math
BROOKE WROTE: Did some math today. This year's incoming college freshman were born in 1991. I wept very salty old lady tears.
Forever 35
THE MIDLIFE GALS WROTE: I have decided to be 35. I am going to skip past the notion that 50 is the new forty and go down to the 30's. It just sounds better and feels better too.
Life is good
LEABRAUSUB WROTE: Hard to pick a "formerly" anything b/c I feel so good now...Just never knew 50 could be so good.
Waxing Formerly
NFA WROTE: I ran out of strips to do my home waxing in the middle of a wax, so I bought another kit. My kids were out on Sunday morning, so I managed to wax the back of one of the unfinished legs. Then they came home, and I couldn't get to the back of the other one. And I'm still walking around with a partially hairy leg.
I think the point of MILF is that you’ve been through the horribly disfiguring act of childbirth and you are STILL attractive. Yuck.
I’m 50 and was referred to as a MLF when I went up onstage at Irish Kevin’s in Key West during Spring Break. Just go for it. Please go to my blog to read about being 50.