We’ll never agree when it comes to use of language. She also gets upset with my children for saying “What the!?” because it IMPLIES that they are leaving off the really awful “bad word” but is there INTENT to use it! WTF?!

I grew up around coarse, crude males. Truckers, hunters and military guys (sometimes a combination!). When I started working, I worked out on a military installation, with nothing but soldiers for miles. Then I worked in a prison. After that - yup, more roughnecks, this time in the form of slope workers (i.e., Arctic Slope oil rig workers). I currently work in rehab (drug/alcohol) and many of my friends are commercial fishermen, former milltary, or from previous occupations.

Needless to say, swearing is almost an artform for some of us. I have been known to eloquently cuss out a drunk at a bar that just wouldn’t “take a hint” when I said that I had no desire to dance (or take my nose out of my book since I was the DD). I can also hold my own, and get the better of, my abusive 1st husband whenever he happens to track me down via internet or phone.

Now, cussing around kids is a bit different. I try not to do it, I really do. I have four very active boys, and as is the nature of boys, they don’t always listen. Hell, they sometimes don’t even hear me when they are playing together in the same room. They know the “7 words you can’t say on tv” (God I miss Carlin). They know that there are some words that they cannot say (yet, with public school - I’m sure they do at recess anyways - I know I did).

My explanation on why they SHOULDN’T cuss is this: The majority of people who cuss lack the intelligence needed to use other, more socially acceptable words to express their frustration. If they want to prove to themselves, and to those around them that they have some intelligence, they shouldn’t cuss.
Of course, this brings up the “but Mom, you cuss” reply. To that, I say this: Yes, I do cuss on occasion (thank goodness they don’t see me at the office some days!). I do it out of habit since your Grandpa (actually, MY grandpa) cussed all the time around me, and it is an aquired bad habit that I have not been able to completely break. (Just a note, my grandpa was a Korean War vet, from a poor farming family of immigrants who was a commercial truck driver for the pipeline for 30 years. Also a big hunter/fisher.) I also tell my kids that by cussing, I am showing my lack of education (9th grade drop-out with a GED, haven’t had the time to go back to college).

I don’t think I’ll be telling them anytime soon that studies show that occasional cussing actually is therapeutic.

I’m no saint and I do feel that sometimes there’s nothing quite so satisfying as letting a good curse word fly in a moment of exasperation. Of course, in an ideal world, it’s not directed at anyone in particular, just shouted out to the universe with no particular target in mind.

I have cautioned my girls about words like “stupid”, when used in a mean-spirited way. And when they say, “I hate ___________!” I inevitably respond with,”Well, ‘hate’ is a very strong word.” So lately they’ve taken to correcting themselves: “I LOATHE _____________!”

Thanks for your post. Glad to know I’m not the only one who slips up…every now and then.

I seem to curse more now, i think. “Frickin” is now a favored word, unfortunately.