I’m strangely not embarrassed to admit that my FORMERLY moment involves a velour jogging suit, fleece-lined crocs, a bird store…and Cheerios.
I was just shy of 41 when I needed to wrap up some Christmas shopping in 2009. My mother-in-law wanted a specific birdhouse at a store somewhere out in the boonies and time was running out. I was sick and tired–both of shopping AND legitimately ill–and didn’t have the energy to doll up for a dreary December drive to the country. Hence, the velour/croc ensemble.
The guys at the bird store were very helpful, and even a bit flirty despite my haggard look, so I actually had a brief “I’ve still got it” moment as I strutted back out to the car with a pep in my croc…even spinning around with a smile as they called after me with a “Miss” (instead of the dreaded “Ma’am”). Well, my ego boost was short-lived. Turns out, they only wanted my attention to inform me that “…uh…you have a Cheerio stuck to your bottom.”
Let the Formerly Phase begin.