OK, cough it up!I want to know what your FORMERLY is, not least of all because perhaps it'll be as superficial and relatively unimportant in the scheme of things as is mine.
Obviously, the fact that you've always been the smartest kid in your family and yet couldn't bring yourself to finish your dissertation is nothing compared to the problems of veterans returning minus a limb, but it's still worth a few words. Or that your high school peers voted you most likely to get rich quick and you're working at Dunkin' Donuts. Or that you had the marriage and little blond children that seemed so perfect, and now you have an ex and bigger blond children that you see every other weekend.
Boo-effin'-hoo, some will say. You're not homeless. You're not trapped in some abandoned bomb shelter with nothing but a skeleton and some plant water to drink like that girl on All My Children. Get some real problems. And you will, at some point. But for now, I want to hear about your FORMERLY.
Go to the drop-down menu, and select a FORMERLY from among the ones I posted. If none apply, write your own in the box to the right. And then give me a few words (no more than 200) on your FORMERLY, what it meant to you and how you're dealing. You can also post a relevant picture (it needn't be you but something that says it all). Keep it relatively clean, kids, and feel free to post more than one. You can be serious, self-mocking, however you feel.

JOSH WROTE: People always used to say I resembled John McEnroe, because of my curly dark hair. Now, on a good day, they say I look like Charlotte’s husband on Sex and the City. On a bad day, they say I look like George Costanza.
Photo by: rubyyot, CC Licensed
December 24th, 2008
by StephanieDolgoff
Posted in HOT, What's Your Formerly?
774 views, Add a Comment! »
Tags: George Costanza, John McEnroe, Sex and the City

MELISSA WROTE: The other day I saw three 20-something girls walking together, laughing, acting like they were the center of the universe. They stepped into the street, just assuming cars and other people would get out of the way and, because they were young and pretty, people did.
Man, I miss that feeling.
December 17th, 2008
by StephanieDolgoff
Posted in HOT, What's Your Formerly?
1,216 views, Add a Comment! »
Tags: hot shit
When stopped by the police for some small, non-lethal infraction, I used to be able to be at least hot enough or cute enough to get out of the ticket. Now, at 41, I’m not a dog, but I have to be much more… perky? cute? charismatic? Basically, I have to be a really good conversationalist. Oh, and taking responsibility never hurts either!
I’m going to send this quick! Before I lose my nerve!
December 3rd, 2008
by StephanieDolgoff
Posted in HOT
906 views, Comments Off
Tags: cute, HOT, perky