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skinny jeans

Desperate, much?

The above ad on the New York City subway is part of a series of Lumix ads that are all too clearly aimed at snagging the young consumer. Others in the series say, “Fits perfectly in those skinny jeans pockets,”… Continue Reading →

Girls gone mild

All I can say is that they didn’t have “nipple petals” when I was at an age where I could even consider going braless. Or if they did, I didn’t know about them. I’m talking about those little adhesive flower-shaped… Continue Reading →

More things I know now

That “skinny jeans” are only skinny if you’re skinny That any jacket can be a fitted jacket, if you’ve put on enough weight That I am not, nor was I ever, skinny If I am ever skinny in the future,… Continue Reading →

Formerly a vegetable steamer

I used to work at a magazine, Real Simple, that has a feature called New Uses for Old Things. It was my favorite section, even though there was no way on God’s increasingly less green Earth that I’d ever try… Continue Reading →